Damn You, Ironyf!

You know something? I knew this would happen.  I knew if I got cocky about my super-stupendous proofreading skills they’d turn out to be not so super-stupendous after all.  That’s what you get when you show off in front of the Spelling Gods.  Unlike many mortals, the Spelling Gods know the meaning of the word irony.  Also, hubris.

So this morning I posted a fun little factlet in the form of this review of the second “Sin City” movie, the headline of which contained a misspelling of the word “vicious.”  And this wasn’t an article from some crap publication, either–it was the Washington Post, and “vicious” was spelled correctly within the review.  You’d think a 17-word headline would be easier to spell-check than a 9-paragraph article, right?  Apparently, not so much, since as of right now the headline STILL contains the misspelling.  Ugh. What’s the world coming to if you can’t count on the Washington Post to uphold the rigorous rules of standardized American English.

Right?

Then later today, I got a ping from a Simpsons blog, Dead Homer Society, with a roundup of fun, dull, and aggravating posts about “The Simpsons” from around the web.  And there–right there at the end!–is my post about being in Ocean City and getting a garbage bag full of popcorn!  Another Miss Fickle Shout-out!  Calloo Callay!!!

But, wait a second…that first sentence quoted from my blog…what does that say again?

Now, when you say “open,” the teenager sticks your tub and lid inside a clear plastic garbage bag and shovel as much popcorn as could be expected to fit in or around your tub.

“…the teenager sticks…and shovel???”  That should be “shovels”!  With an “s” on the end!  That’s straight ahead subject/verb agreement I got horribly wrong!  And I always proofread all my goddamn posts so that something like this never happens!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Lisa Simpson, Ship’s Proofreader on board the rocket evacuating Earth after the Y2K disaster,* would be terribly disappointed in me.

For all you readers out there firing up your schadenfreude (as I would definitely be under other circumstances): I’ve already corrected this particular mistake, so you can’t see my original screw-up with your own eyes.  However, I’m sure there are plenty of other gaffes, should you choose to scrutinize my five months’ worth of posts.  And I invite you to do so if you want to call me out on this.  It’s only fair.  Those whom the Spelling Gods have chastised should not go about hiding their shame. Or challenging the Washington Post to a proofreading smackdown.  Damn journalists with their troll-seeking voodoo dolls…

*From “Treehouse of Horror X,” in case anyone’s keeping track.

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